I believe that we have many chances at LOVE throughout our lives. Though at times I have personally questioned whether I will meet more than just one soul mate in my lifetime. But whether you believe in soul mates or not, you must understand that everything in life is based on the respect and LOVE that you have for yourself.
To me, LOVE is and will always be, the total essence that binds us all together…forming compassion. Hopefully we all know what it feels like to be around people that show us unquestionable support and belief in ourselves. But that is not always the case; because life can be a constant labyrinth of figuring out what is the best way to move as we try to adapt through the many experiences and personalities of our life’s journey.
But there is one thing that you should never allow in your life plan knowingly; and that is someone that brings out and exploits your own personal feelings of being “less”. Life can be messy, so understanding and embracing the importance of feeling that you are enough must take precedent over everything!
Along with that desire to try to surround ourselves with supportive people, we also must stop depending on others to convince ourselves that we are complete and whole. This essence must be instilled on your own. Otherwise you are going to be very disappointed with all of your relationships in the long run. Because you will constantly feel somehow short changed because of your dependency on outside validation. This is a very difficult personality trait to carry into any relationship especially marriage. When someone is choosing to spend their life with you they should NOT COMPLETE YOU…but COMPLIMENT YOU! So, sorry Jerry McGuire!
Searching for that someone that you need to go to…on a daily basis to make you feel validated and appreciated is draining on those who need to constantly reaffirm you. Eventually your mere presence could suck the life right out of the room. There will never be enough validation from others that will ever satisfy what you are truly hungry for. It will be like trying to keep a fire burning 24/7. It takes a lot of energy…but eventually it will have to die out. The key is knowing how to start the fire on your own. Then when you meet that someone special that you would LOVE to have a connection with, the flames will just grow bigger and more intense as they burn together.
Owning this philosophy, and I mean truly owning it. Not just saying it, but really trying to embrace it. Eventually you will steer clear of getting involved with people that do not value or respect what you have to bring into the relationship.
So if you are entering in a new relationship or already in one…ask yourself “do I feel cherished and supported with my connections?” If you don’t feel cherished and supported then through time this frustration becomes even more magnified. Your anger will start to show in the smallest of issues that will arise. How do remedy this? Ask for what you need, to feel cherished!
Most are afraid to ask for what they want because of possibly feeling that...”if they LOVE me, then they should ask me what I want or they should just know”. OMG! Seriously people let’s wake up! First off, those who are in your life are not mind readers, and second why are you trying to make it so complicated. I understand that many are afraid to state their needs in fear that they will push the other person away. Possibly thinking that you are being to demanding and needy. But it is just the reverse, you need to ask for what you want and need in relationships. That way it makes it easier for others to understand what makes you happy. Simply state…I LOVE it when you….or it makes me feel sad when you….don’t whine and complain; or command and demand your desires in life and what you need in the relationship. Remember that your end goal is to strengthen your own self-LOVE by expressing your desires. Once you have discovered how empowering this is, which is essential in establishing a strong core belief system for yourself. You’ll be surprised how your partner will respond…their desire is to truly see you happy and when you show them the way how to make you happy…magic occurs.
Surrendering to LOVE, is a statement that totally epitomizes what we all need to do in life. Surrendering just means to, simply find ease to allow and accept what is going on in our lives no matter how crazy it can get.
The philosophy of surrendering, has nothing to do with giving up on life and letting others feel victorious, or worst yet feeling defeated. Relationships on all levels need to make us feel “more”. This is all about self-empowerment. In times of crisis we all obviously want things to go a certain way. But until I started applying this philosophy in my own life, that is when I started to see some pretty wonderful and mysterious things occur. Now, as soon as something is not moving with ease, it is my signal to let go and allow another direction and as I have already said. This pertains to all areas of your life, work/career and especially personal connections. Because once this is discovered and applied, I believe that this is the nirvana that everyone is searching for in life.
Most people are waiting on the world to change around them, be the change. Two key’s to success of that change are allowing and non-reaction. Project LOVE, acceptance, compassion, inner wealth, and then it will be present in your world all around. The world always reflects back to you, how you personally treat yourself and as cliché as it might sound, learning that the first true LOVE affair begins with the total acceptance of yourself. It is proven that confidence, not ego, is the sexiest element of attraction when attracting and being LOVE.
Triple x triple o,